parent of the month, PARENTING

The Biography of a Victorious Father

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!! We truly treasure the fathers that make our family feel strong and complete. I am introducing today, one such rare FATHER. Read the story of this parent from his child’s narration and in the end, bask in the wisdom shared by this marvelous human being. Today, we are talking about Mwalimu Desai or in other words Mr. Raman Desai. (Mwalimu means Teacher in Ki-Swahili).

It is not like diamonds are found everywhere.  Precious things rare, so are precious people. 

Mwalimu Desai is a highly sought out person in Mwanza city (Tanzania country in Central East Africa) and immensely loved by the locals. Mind you, do not be fooled by his simple dressing – usually a pale white or brown pant with a simple T-shirt tucked into a black belt. The Kikapu (a little bamboo suitcase) and his white hat are a part of his signature dressing. As he passes the streets filled with hustle of several hundreds, watch his popularity wave by.

Behind the warmth of this soothing smile, is a man who has fought the worst battles of Parenthood in a span of over 2 decades; nightmares that can make our skin disown us and yet through the turbulence, he has managed to emerge victorious. He kept moving on through the rocky roads of life and demanded victory over each moment. Today his life may seem to be at a lot more at ease while he still continues to spread his down-to-earth generosity. Jan 15th of this year, he celebrated his 81st Birthday!

The crux of this biography is – “It is easy to survive through the toughest times but it is not easy to LIVE through life’s traumas, emerge victorious and yet continue to live with enthusiasm, modesty and selflessly”.

                                                                              HIS-STORY

Raman Desai experienced a sudden crash in his financial situation at the most crucial juncture of life. He had 2 kids, one who was 1 year old and other just 5. All of a sudden the roof over his head was ripped off, everything was lost, everything! Having 2 children to feed and a very simple salary to work off on, he knew, he had no choice but to STEER through his situation! For 25 years since then, he put his sweat and blood together to ensure that his children get EVERYTHING THAT THEY DESERVE. In that tough journey, he had the courage and companionship of the most important person – his Wife: Late Mrs. Vandana Desai.

                                              A MESSAGE FROM HIS SON

  • “Dad had a very basic salary. He would wear old clothes for several years, even patch them up so that they would last longer. It was a tough situation financially but dad and mom never brought those troubles to the forefront. They did their best to give us everything they could and always gave priority to our needs. They would work for 20 hours a day (with no exaggeration). Yes, 20 hours – day and night, cyclostyling; which they did for years! (*An ancient device for duplicating handwriting, in which a pen with a small toothed wheel pricks holes in a sheet of waxed paper, which is then used as a stencil). If you know how a cyclostyle works, it requires a lot of hand effort and doing that for so many hours each day sounds painful! 

  • This was just ‘One of the several jobs’ they did to make sure we had food to eat, clothes to wear and books to study from. In fact, I had a major illness as a child. I had severe asthama since age 4 till my 20s. I would get asthama attacks and my health would be down for days. Mom and Dad had to call the doctors in emergency several times, stay up late at night for days together. NEVER, NOT ONCE, did they complain for the long drooling hours of no sleep and the efforts they had to put in for my care. I knew I was strictly not allowed to eat certain things but I would be careless but still they stayed calm and accepting of me. It is phenomenal how affectionate, caring, and kind they were.
  • Dad gave us the best education. We had to be sent far for our education starting standard (Grade) 7th. It was a tough decision as expenses were higher with flight travels, abroad stays and lots of other challenges especially due to my health problems. We were some of lucky few children who were sent out of Mwanza city and in the States for higher studies. There were other parents in town who could very well afford it financially but they did not send their children. With my parents, it was the opposite situation. We literally went abroad with pennies in our pockets but my dad’s faith, his courage and his support did it for us! It was completely unimaginable and I still cant fathom how my parents did it.
  • Till date, I do not know how many LOANS he had taken over the years to put us through these schools;  he has NEVER told us or made us feel short. And today both me and my sister are well settled at such wonderful jobs and lives. We continue to follow my dad’s philosophy – he always taught us to be generous, kind and content with what we have. We were among the poorest in town but yet, my parents gave the most donations of food to the needy.
  • They taught us to give others even when we did not have enough to eat at home. They taught me to help others and they always PRACTICED WHAT THEY TAUGHT US. They also instilled in us the values of FAMILY LIFE. For several years they stayed awake and worked 19-20 hours a day, yet they would remove time to play games with us each evening. They also added a lot of fun and humor to our daily lives, it did not even make us realize what their sorrows were. And in spite of all those sorrows, they have always supported us in our endeavors and wishes.

                                        A MESSAGE FROM MWALIMU RAMAN DESAI

My (late) wife and I have never asked for any help. We worked day and night to raise our children in the right and the best way. And even when our children were small, they extended help to us. Yes, there were times when we argued and fought. It was not all rosy and easy. But love abided within us and in the end, we were one always! This is the greatest challenge of a parent – to teach unity and love to overcome all the small difficulties or faults that we see in life or each other. Our goal was to bring them up and give them the best type of education that they can lead a good life and help other needy people.

I hope other parents feel encouraged and inspired from this message. That is the purpose of me writing here. Consider your child as a lovely plant in the garden. The tree grows with time and only the one which is nurtured the best from inside, no matter what weather conditions were outside, bears fresh, fruits for years to come!”

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Self-Awareness

Are TWIN FLAMES fairly recent on Earth?

Who said TWIN FLAMES is a Recent Concept?

(This concept is brought to you Organically by Rima Desai)

People talk about #TwinFlames are being a Recent Concept. We are so wrong!

Radha-Krishna the epic Godly couple from Ancient India, are Twin Flames. Radha and Krishna are the most famous couple in the Indian mythology, depicting the epitome of Love, Kindness, Godliness. Even though Krishna had many wives and Radha was never married to him, Krishna is never shown without Radha and neither ever shown with his wives. His soul is shared by Radha and hence they are always prayed, depicted and looked upon together as INSEPARABLE.

Radha and Krishna’s love cannot be worded in humanly ways because their love was so supreme and strong, it surpassed all humanly dimensions. They shared the most ETERNAL, HIGHEST FORM of LOVE, Unconditionally loved each other. They could hear each other’s thoughts despite physical separation and they did not require the traditional ‘marriage’ as a form of unison or to feel the deepest form of love for each other. They broke all cultural taboos and yet were worshiped for the quality of love and virtues that they set for generations to come. Radha and Krishna are Twin Flames and hence are depicted TOGETHER as inseparable over eternal Centuries.

If you as well are in a Twin Flame Relationship, you know how SACRED this Relationship is. It requires a tough heart, an old soul and a virtuous existence to be blessed by a Twin Flame Relationship. I feel very lucky to be so! Do you?

Brought to you organically by Rima Desai

www.rimadesai.org

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Self-Awareness, TWIN FLAMES

Where to Start, Where to Go?

At some point of life or another, each one of us feels the chaos of the Crossroads of life. A churning within which is difficult to express and even harder to get through. Hardships or challenges often come in unannounced ways where we reach a breaking point of having to ultimately make a choice. 

One of those huge challenges for me was to get down to the blunt reality of life. My choice was to continue staying in a marriage which I was finally well aware and in acceptance of as – A Loveless, Dead, Emotionally Apathetic Marriage which I had responsibly lived for 11 years. I had given it all I had, even more and waited for magic to happen long enough. But finally, I had decided to get over my denial. But just like we say that Ignorance is Bliss, it did seem so real for once. Was ignorance bliss? Now, knowing what I knew, I had the crossroads of making a CONSCIOUS CHOICE – To move out and bear the burden of a 7 year young with an almost nil bank balance, no real career given a 10 year lag of working permit in foreign lands OR continue being the Master of Pretense.

This was the real deal, the real test of my life, my strength, my sanity and above all the test of FAITH. I didn’t have any answers to WHO to go to, HOW to do it, WHEN to do it, WHAT exactly needed to be done, WHERE to go and I was shaky about the WHY. 

What led me through all of that was one thing – A deep inner KNOWING of what felt right and the COURAGE to do it anyway. My story is long and rather magical after that. But in short, I took the leap of faith and I can proudly say now that behind every Super Successful Leader you have ever known, was a BEGINNER’s SOUL. You have to take the 1st step forward and allow to ‘Be Guided’ on the rest. 

I was divinely guided by a Team of Humans in the form of Life-Coach, Hypnotherapist, Psychic, Healers whom I sought help from, paid when it felt insane and then followed the Magical journey of the DIVINE GUIDANCE from a Team of inhuman (Supernatural) forces like Angels, Spirit Guides, Deities and more which flipped my barren life terrain into a beautifully flourishing meadow. 

Confused just like I was? START ANYWAY and GO FOR IT. SEEK HELP. You Deserve Support, Success and Joy!!

~ ONCE A BEGINNER, NOW A LEADER~

WWW.RIMADESAI.ORG

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Self-Awareness

The Secret To Tame Those Wild Curls

All of us some secrets in life, some big, some small, some seemingly insignificant. This post is about one of mine and it’s something to do with my habits! Maybe this got you guessing into many different directions or maybe you were one of the few who read my recent Facebook Post. This post is about how to tame those curly, messy sparks into a smooth, shiny gloss without using hair dryers or harsh hair sprays.  

Being an on the go dedicated Mom who works full time, is a part time entrepreneur, writer, vlogger, and values each moment of life, requires products that are on-the-go which do not ask me to step into the salon, dig into my pockets or pry onto recipes online.

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But before we talk about my Secrets, let’s rewind a little bit into my history. My history of being a woman of substance ;) Joking! I mean, that although I am a strong contender when it comes to dressing with style (mood defines the willingness for sure), I slack with my hair big time. A big reason for that is my environment friendly, health conscious brain. Healthy, natural, staying organic, as chemical free as possible was something I was born with.

Things like face packs, face foundations, hair dryers, hair irons, hair sprays are never to be found on my dressing counter, neither in the backlash, forgotten colonies. I haven’t owned them in 37 years and sparingly allowed the hair stylists to use them at my wedding and sheer handful others.

I am the typical no-make up freak girl and hence what you find in my cosmetic closet are true treasures of value, often pretty old too.

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One among them are my favorite hair products. My hair has naturally been very wavy from birth. O the curls I used to have when I was little were born princessesy! (This word was just born) But lately, I have occasionally wanted to go straight every so often, without having to use a hair dryer or hair iron. The picture above is showing my hair much more tamed! The real ones are the African lion manes after their final encounter with the shower and towel dried, before my comb gets to kiss the curls goodbye. L-O-L. No kidding!

So here was the post that went onto Facebook 3 days ago, to which some asked- “Please share the secret”.

My hair is naturally very wavy and I have never owned or used a hair dryer and hair sprays (except when hair stylists use it). Then how do I get my hair to be so straight? It’s a Secret ingredient!

So what is it that changes my hair from that to this in a matter of minutes?

 

 

It is something I do and something I apply.  Here is the SECRET to this smooth rainfall:

  1. I  wash my hair with this amazing shampoo which not only fluffs and softens my hair but also goes super gentle on my scalp psoriasis + it costs a quarter than the crazy fragrance filled brand names that often do not deliver their promise

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2. I straighten my hair when yet slightly damp. I do not allow my hair to dry off as they are almost curly and then are hard to tame. Using a good quality, soft bristled hair brush is important too. I use a flat head one and honestly take the time to flatten them well.

3. I apply a spot of this little magic after my hair is dry and then straighten them again.

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I found it for a great price at a salon and decided to use it. It requires no more than one dot literally! and honestly, I haven’t finished this bottle in 2 years now. I use it maybe once in 2 months when I truly want my hair to look spectacular.

Here’s the final finish effect which I love. I am still very lazy with my hair and haven’t learnt to play with the styles like other women do. Being a mix of a macho Mars and a soft Moon, I get to keep both the Yin and the Yan side of me and cherish living life on the go as a Mom!

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Please share and like the post to your will. Besides being a passionate writer, I am passionate about turning Women Lives from Trials to Triumphs. Know all about me HERE

Are you a Full Time, On the go, concerned, dedicated, stressed Mom? READ THIS!

Rima Desai – www.rimadesai.org
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TWIN FLAMES

Twins in the Whispers of History

Spiritual Leaders in the human world have been raving about the ‘Golden Age’ which started in 2012. All that talk about the earth to be destroyed was actually about the new phase we were to jump on, also called as the ‘Ascension’.

There are some very trans-formative, powerful shifts happening on earth given this much needed spiritual uproar. Twin Flames and all the mysterious excitement around it is one of them. There are truly not many Twin Flames ascending as human selves in close proximity. Those that are, are lucky, are very ‘old souls’  and carry the wisdom that will play a key part in keeping earth ‘alive’ in the coming generations.

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While it is easy to confuse a Soul Mate or Karmic Bond with a Twin Flame relationship, a Twin Flame alone can truly mark that difference. In one word it is a SACRED relationship, two souls embodied into ONE. Then that ONE SOUL is given two bodies, one given by the Universe where Souls are bonded for the deepest trans formative exercises of highest self-actualization, almost as close to Godliness as it can get.

Twin Flames (TF) have very strong whirlpool like attraction and affection towards one another. They may be perfect strangers when they meet but the connection is the peak of a deja vu unexplained. That attraction is so hard to resist that like same poles of a magnet, they crave to be together and yet repel each other very quickly.

Twin Flames often look alike when put together and have exactly same or very identical habits, virtues, personality, upbringing, experiences in life, family structures, religious backgrounds and careers. They live what is called as PARALLEL LIVES. This means that what one Twin does, immediately and directly impacts another twin even without any interaction or physical proximity. They may be in two different continents or planets, the energetic power is so intense and inter-coiled that their experiences become magnetic. The ways in which they or their lives are stark antonyms, highlights areas of growth.

In this body, my TF journey started a handful of years ago, in this soul, it started a handful of lifetimes ago. However, this post I do not desire to define more of what a TF is but rather just to ‘express’ who I am, why I am so honored to be where I am in life. The thread of life, as a gift that my TF gave me in the deepest darkest hours of chaos, without ever even physically being present, in communion or his consciousness, is the most invaluable gift my soul has and will ever cherish. Read on…

…I personally believe that Krishna-Radha are the perfect TWIN FLAME examples. Krishna is the highest revered Hindu God and Radha was his eternal love. Krishna’s wife was not known in history but Radha continues to be worshiped and their UNCONDITIONAL bond has set the stone for inspiration for generations. Despite his marriage, his true communion was with Radha, an attraction they both could not resist and was also cherished by humanity at a time when virtues of only one physical bond was an all or nothing phenomenon.

It is the highest soul level relationship one can be in and I feel honored to experience all of it’s major highs and deep lows. This roller coaster relationship is nothing and never short on spiritual Drama as the Universe weaves out it’s yarns seamlessly with no particular direction except one – constant and MANDATORY FORWARD motion IN INTENSE SELF ACTUALIZATION.

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A TF relationship forces one to constantly face fears, Insecurities, emotional patterns and spiritual accountability without being physically too proximate to one’s TWIN or too far apart to be able to escape it.

How I have evolved with this Sacred Union is beyond description but people witness that charm and strength. And while I have not conversed with my Twin in exactly 2 years now, we have never been apart in Unison for a single moment. We hear each other’s thoughts, feel each other’s happiness and pain and dance together I’m higher dimensions of existence.

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And as the soul seeks more evolution, today I evolved further up digging out deeper fears and learning to be more vulnerable than ever before, even walking rt front of my Twin’s Space without ever knowing if an interaction would be possible or unlikely.

When I met my twin for the first time, I had no clue but life began to stir up all the questions and chaos which I had suppressed within me for ages. Who am I, why am I living a subdued life, defining it with a victim’s eye and allowing it to be a passive experience. I had given in to the ‘have to live’ and ‘have to somehow get through’ with the intense pain. Grief was my word of the day for several years but the more I encountered my Twin, the more it mirrored to me the self-identity I was missing, an invisible scar that sketched out as a 100 broken mirrors poking their sharp edges into a marriage that was loveless, broken, abusive and a life I had become a slave to.

And so I moved, energetically, worked emotionally and grew into something I would have never believed I could. An strong, independent woman leading the light for others now.

Manifestation after all is super easy and that’s why so hard as it requires breaking all boundaries with Vulnerability and learning to stay in the Unpredictability of Life. ~Coach Rima Desai

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While Twins go back several life times in history and I have seen so many of those clearly, they THRIVE only by mastering the HERE and NOW – Zero strings attached. No past, no future and in that we continue to be reborn limitless times and each nano second is a new birth of oneself and a MIRROR to one’s TWIN. ~ Rima Desai

And so goes for all Twins reincarnating on Earth with this time of Ascension and Transformation. Remember Krishna-Radha!

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You may also like THIS ARTICLE

Rima’s website

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Self-Awareness, Venting Our Feelings

SUCCESS, MIRACLES, LIFE!

“How can you invest in yourself today for a promising tomorrow?”
– Life-Coach Rima Desai

Have you known anyone highly depressed, anxious and suicidal? Have you seen them completely transformed from that WITHOUT the use of any medications? I was once that – a totally depressed teenager with suicidal behaviors. But something drastically changed my life and it started with something small, a choice. Here is a VIDEO on SUCCESS, MIRACLES, LIFE!

 

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Self-Awareness

The Freedom we never knew

WHAT DOES INDEPENDENCE DAY MEAN?

Often times we get bogged down by people, experiences or situations that seem crippling or harsh. While has it’s way to whip us, we ALWAYS have a choice! To consider ourselves helpless at any point of life, is to ‘give-up’ on life and ourselves. On July 4th, I would like you to celebrate your HERO within.

Dr. Viktor Frankl – victim and survivor of the Nazi camp who was subjected to severe abuse in the camp, lost his family as well, has set the most extraordinaire example of Freedom and Psychology. Viktor Emil Frankl is the founder of logotherapy, which is a form of existential analysis, the “Third Viennese School of Psychotherapy”. Reading ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’ at a very  young age, inspired me and helped me facilitate the  limitlessness I could find within myself. Below, I share a big, inspiring message with you all –

“If there is nothing I can change about the situation, I can change my attitude towards it” @ Create freedom in your thoughts.  ~   Life-Coach Rima Desai

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READ MORE ABOUT VIKTOR FRANKL:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viktor_Frankl

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PARENTING

The Whisper of an Invisible Star

“Dear Woman, a Mother is the one who removes the thorns from one’s heart with a whisper of Love. She is the feather that floats you from a drowning sea and the bucket of Love with seamless boundaries.

 At the moment you feel guilty for the mistakes you have done, resentful for what you haven’t, angry for what others did to your or sad for what you don’t have, simply lift your head up and walk up to a Mirror. Look at the person in front of you in the eye in that Mirror and say to her –

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“For the times when you have been a Mother, for the millions of seconds when you have forgotten your needs for that of your child…

…for the days when you cried alone because you showered smiles at your baby,

…for the nights you awoke worried for someone else’s safety,

…for all that you have selflessly thought and done for your entire family,

…for the times when you haven’t cooked what you loved to fit the joy of the rest,

…for the times when your body hurt and you mustered the courage to go on and

…for a trillion of the billion seconds when you lived up to your duty to be a Mother, you deserve a shower of Love, a bucket of Hugs and Mountains of Flowers

…for you must know that you are not about what you sacrifice, what you feel guilty about, what you did not do right

…for you must care for yourself first, love yourself first, stop always putting the family first

…for you must start showing your children what love truly means, not sacrifice but filling your bucket, appreciating yourself, standing up for yourself, being true to who are and need, making powerful requests and drawing powerful boundaries from the irrational, sacrificial expectations others may have from you. 

…for you deserve to be as much a human being as all others, for we must transform what being a woman means and show our children a new future

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For today is that day like every other day when you get to Celebrate Who You are – a Mother. For you are the ultimate Angel in someone’s world, for you are the whole and the soul for them, for those little twinkling eyes and hearts you ignite with joy and hope every single day. For if you weren’t here, their world would be Dark and Lonely”. 

 

 
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And for that, just for that, Love Yourself Unconditionally. For you are the Divine, for you are a M-O-M! How lucky that you are, that I am, we are! For not a million dollars can win the innocence we experience every day, in the hearts of the purest, through the smiles of our little Angels. 

There are only 2 entities one can pray to. One is God and other is a Mother. While God teaches us Godliness, a Mom executes it every second”. <3

 
~ by Women Empowerment Coach Rima Desai
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Also read for Mother’s Day:

  https://theguidingstar.org/2018/04/23/dailysoupopera/

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Cooking

COLD COFFEE – UNIQUE RECIPE

Hey All You COFFEE LOVERS. For years now my friends have asked me for my coffee recipe and so here is how I make it and why you won’t find it elsewhere! Cold Coffee is called Iced Coffee in USA. It is my favorite, quick recipe to drink on hot summer days. Now this is an old post, I am re-sharing because over the years my coffee has remained true to it’s heroic talent.

So welcome Arizona, to yet another year of a heated mess. Although I love the heat any way, I love it even more with my Cold aka Iced Coffee. What I hate about iced coffee from Starbucks or elsewhere is that they pack with a load of ice with coffee and dairy that tastes very separated, non-blended and unappealing. Or, they pack it up with froth and cream that is heavy fat and sugar, unnecessary for making a tantalizing coffee shake.

Yesterday i.e. on May 6th, 2018, I made this cold coffee once again for my daughter’s teacher and that too without any sugar in it and with v. little dairy. She loved it and sipped every inch to the bottom.

Ingredients:

 – Cold milk of any kind: Dairy or Non-dairy: 250 ml

– Instant Coffee Powder: Nescafe normal or African coffee powder

-Sugar / Stevia / Agave: as needed

-Spices: Pinch of Cinnamon Powder or Cardamom Powder, pinch of Ginger Powder

-2-3 ice cubes, blender and a Coffee-ing Heart

HOW TO MAKE IT:

– Add milk, sugar, coffee and ice. Be sure not to overdo the ice beyond 2-3 cubes . Blend it. Taste it for sugar and modify the sugar as needed. 

  • LOVE: I make it with immense love. I love coffee and love making it for others!

 

  • CREATIVE: I have never looked up any coffee recipe, let alone other recipes. I am not the person who can be patient reading recipes, I rather create one of my own!

 

  • SPICES: Cinnamon powder and ginger powder. Appx. 2 pinches in each glass.

 

  • OTHER STUFF: 4 med. sized ice cubes per glass, blender, milk (any), sugar, coffee.

 

  • Other times I switch the cinnamon for cardamom. Cinnamon gives a spicy ‘kick’ and cardamom gives it sweetness, choose either.20160821_231951

 

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PARENTING, Self-Awareness

To do or not to? A Mom’s Eternal ‘Soup’ Opera

   SINGLE MOM? MARRIED yet SINGLE??

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY in Advance. This post is dedicated to Moms, Stay-at-home, Working, Single or just simply M-O-M-S; Also dedicated to those feeling very stressed as Moms or having stressful marriages. It may sound funny and yet truly a Mom’s Daily Opera can very well be feeling like they are in a ‘Soup’. Being a Life-Coach for Women (Women Empowerment Coach), I get to see that a lot with my clients. To do or not to do? To say or not to say? To ‘stay’ or not to stay? To prioritize their lives or not? … endless thoughts…

Living as a Single Parent is never easy, I grew up in one. My mom died when I was 6. We were a family of 3 – My dad, my elder sis and me. While we had massive emotional struggles both individually and collectively due to a whole range of factors, today I talk more in terms of Moms / Women who are Married and yet are Single Moms.  I mean that hundreds of moms are the ones taking 80% to 100% of the responsibility of child care and home management. I also talk about the moms who were married and later became Single Moms. I fall more so somewhere in between ;)

It has been an interesting and eye-opening ride. I have found immense blessings in the decisions I have taken to free up my internal space, emotional space and sense of freedom for self-expression. It is funny how despite the democracies we live in, thousands of Moms / Women live in relationships where they feel total lack of freedom of self-expression, even lack of freedom of thought! I was that Mom for half a decade! I was that Wife for a Decade! I was that Woman for 3 Decades!!!! Now?? No more! I stepped up to myself, to my life, to my rights, to my child and our future!

 WEEKEND BONANZA?! Moms always get it for free ;)

This weekend has been one of those weekends so typical of being almost a Single Mom. From Friday evening my mind’s pool has been scuba diving into this dire need to write a life-shaking article and I finally get to it on Sunday night at 11pm! …

…An article on how we women feel trapped and keep ourselves woven into this endless victim-hood cycle of the necessary sacrifice we MUST do for our family. I don’t mean to generalize this to all women, neither to just women, there are men too that suffer and sacrifice. Yet my focus in this article and in all the work I do as a Women-Empowerment Coach and Psychologist is towards all the Asian, Indian and other Moms who feel culturally hemmed by the rigid beliefs shoved down our throats (metaphor!), literally since our conception.

Yes, since conception! This is because several beliefs are passed on to us through our mothers, the emotions they feel, thoughts they have, any suffering they feel or behavior patterns they have are passed on to us in our womb. In the womb, we receive our first teachings about re-living these emotional patterns of Victimhood, Persecution, Martyr Archetypes, etc. and pass then we pass them on to our children and future generations. Just like any other inherited illness like varicose veins, thyroid, diabetes, etc., it is like a trademark or a tendency we carry with our soul and then it gets activated when we encounter it socially.

 

         SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN??

This means serious good news! It means that we have way more control over our destiny than we ever thought or believed. The genes we carry can be energetically re-woven and socially insulated when we choose to alter our emotional patterns, behaviors and self-defeating beliefs. This can be done in several ways. The one most effective for me and thousands of other women has been COUNSELING, LIFE-COACHING, PAST-LIFE REGRESSION, HYPNOTHERAPY, SRP or FAMILY CONSTELLATION, SELF-HYPNOSIS, GUIDED MEDITATIONS, REIKI, etc.

Believe it or not, in the past 2 years I have opened myself up to ALL of the above therapies and used a combination of EACH and ALL of these therapies to fish out a new baby out of me – a new ‘Self-Identity’ I mean. A new way of thinking, feeling and living. I have TRANSFORMED 280 degrees and continue to move towards the 360 mark! A big proof to that is my TWIN FLAME ACTIVATION and this super powerful journey that I am in. A second huge proof to this is the quality of LIVE VIDEOS, presentation and confidence that so many viewers tell me I clearly depict! A third proof is that now, I facilitate the powerful transformation of others. I can go on with the list of success and transformation I and others have found in me since all the major healing I have done. Above all, the happiness that spills out of me is at a totally different level. Clearing up the Generational Pathology that Women in my ancestral weave have inherited was probably one huge sigh of relief.

However, Family Constellation, SRP and Past life regression has its limitations. In that, it can clear up negative, stuck energy and soul contracts and yet we have to do our Inner Work in clearing up our belief systems, be willing to confront our fears, shames, guilts and grief, face the hardest and show willingness to change. No one can change our destiny but ourselves.

It is definitely not easy. It requires one to sit on a wired fence with a fire at the bottom and a sword hanging above. What I mean by that is the ‘fear’ part of confronting a whole new life-style against societal beliefs. Most women chicken out because of the high risk of social taboos and probable social rejection. Courage is one thing I have, for I cannot be a Revolutionary, a Leader if I can’t walk the talk! How can I guide other Moms and Women onto a saner life and path if I can’t show what Speaking Up means, what drawing strong boundaries means while continuing to be kind and unconditional in one’s acceptance of self and others. How can I motivate and encourage you to alter your identity and life-style if I cannot question and confront harmful societal and cultural practices.

Don’t get me wrong. One does not always have to bat out of a marriage or take extreme measures. The aim is ALWAYS to be objective about the next best steps and the final goal. If one can spark the beginning of a two way street, it is the way to go. Sometimes just putting your foot down and stop being the door mat can do wonders. Women are so used to giving endless and feeling empty within, the man almost never realizes how much is being taken for granted. Often times the problem is with us. We need to give less and do enough for ourselves so that our bucket of Love and Joy does not drain out like cooking what we love just as often as we cook what the family loves. Even practices like asking for care from the family when we are ill or drawing a boundary on how much and how often we will entertain guests can be super helpful in the long run. We receive no productive outcome/s when we just about don’t do that and also keep constantly complaining.

But then there are many women that have been or are being seriously abused or ones that are on an endlessly one street dead end curve; where there is almost no hope for recuperation or any real love and cooperation coming from the man no matter what one does. Some men clearly refuse counseling, mutual discussion or anything to do with healing the relationship. They may be in denial or in defensive mode and may even stay there forever!

Ultimately, you are the best judge of your next steps. You know deep in your heart what’s your truth and your sixth sense must be your best advocate. It knows! As long as you can differentiate between your 6th sense and your logic, and follow the deep nudge, you are good to go. As for me too, you may need a lot of VALIDATION in the early steps, and constant ones too! I asked for it more and more, again and again from my experts and my true well-wishers and today I am anything but Thankful a 100 times and more :)

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                A POT OF ADVICE by ME

“The parents who think that they are staying in the marriage only for the kids are either having an excuse to run away from the fears of separation or are lacking perspective.

If we stay in a #marriage that harbors Bitterness, Harshness, Arguments, Lack of Love, Judgement and rejection despite all efforts, then we are showing our children that Relationships are a Burden and all about Bitterness. That to me, is not #Commitment, that is Foolishness!Killing our happiness by the fear of society or the fear of our children’s future is showing and teaching our children to do the same things in their future. It is Actually Killing their future to see a #Partnership that is Superficial, Contractual in Nature where both parents stay in a partnership merely for the Sake of it. Pretence is never healthy.

Stay in a marriage for #Love, #Unity and #Companionship, our children need to see that. If we cannot show our children that, then we must show them LOVE by Being our Individual selves outside the Marriage. Sometimes #Divorce is Wisdom and a Gift to our children!”

~ Soul Food ~ by Coach Rima Desai ~ Happy Upcoming Mother’s Day!!

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