WARNING: This exercise shifts your vibrations quickly and very powerfully! It creates DEEP IMPACT, in a super short time and changes vibrations of your body, mind, spirit – health, emotions and soul and improves your relationships, abundance, sense of well-being, reduces stress and more! Proceed only if you need all or any of these ;) Watch the VIDEO HERE

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Isn’t it surprising how little kids today can use the word ‘stress’ so commonly. Is stress supposed to be in a child’s dictionary? No! But unfortunately, it is the truth of today’s world.

In this fast-paced, highly demanding world, it is easy to become the non-stop robot that does-does-does and never stops. Our bodies and minds have become machines that are constantly working even when we are asleep. No wonder, a lot of dissatisfaction fills us today. We are unable to give our mind and soul the food it yearns – silence and peace.

In my practice as a psychologist, Life-coach and kids mentor, I have found that more Moms and children stressed, depressed and anxious than have ever imagined. The stories you see on Facebook are most often a wonderful Façade. In fact, the best ones you see are the ones ‘hiding’ the most. I have found value in giving Moms quick, short exercises proves way more helpful than advice for meditating or for an entire life-style change all at once. It can be too scary to tell you to stop eating sugar, start sleeping early and keep a healthy routine. We know that most often it’s just not possible. Our day starts at night and goes on till the next night and it’s non-stop ;) Even in sleep we are planning how to go about ‘tomorrow’ and day after and planning 10 years ahead too! Haha. It sounds funny but I understand the stress totally. India, USA, Australia, no matter where we live, we want to give our family the best and yet we forget it is so important to PAUSE, RELAX and even RECEIVE or in other words, GIVE OURSELVES something too – especially time and appreciation.That is called ‘Mom’s Life’ after all. So what then can be the solution?

Here it is – your 5 Minutes to De-stress, 5 Minutes to Heaven! This exercise is a quick 5 minute exercise that can create a HUGE POSITIVE IMPACT quickly. All you need to commit is to do it twice a week. 10 minutes a week! Totally doable! And the best part is that you can do this exercise while bathing, driving, walking, in bed or just about anywhere. This exercise applies to any child 4 years + who is growing developmentally at his or her age level.

I call this exercise ‘THE ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE’. In our non-stop, fast pace, constant GO-GO-GO life we have often forgotten to verbally or consciously express gratitude towards the little things in life. Finding happiness in the small stuff, the fact that we have eyes to read this article, a functional brain to comprehend it, a family to share our joys with, a home to save from the cold weather, foot wear, roads to drive on to go to work, clean water to drink and the list can be a million things. By no means do I mean to reduce the importance of your struggles.

Only you can understand the pain that you are in with all that goes on in your life and yet for a few moments, we can choose to keep that pain aside just for 10 minutes in a WEEK and truly look deep into what our lives would be without all that we had and have! Hope you enjoy the video Moms and give me your take on this one.In what other ways do you express Gratitude towards all that you have?

It is great to know and say that I don’t need to say it, I already feel gratitude and yet it is like the “I Love You” which you love to hear your kids say to you. You know they love you and yet you want to hear it over and again, I do too! In the same way, the Universe wants to know what we love about it, what we are happy to have so that it can keep giving us that and more! Watch my video where I explain this exercise with ease. 

Remember: This exercise shifts your vibrations quickly and very powerfully! It creates DEEP IMPACT, in a super short time and changes vibrations of your body, mind, spirit – health, emotions and soul and improves your relationships, abundance, sense of well-being, reduces stress and more! And it can be practiced by children too.

Much Love, Rima Desai

PARENTING

TOP 10 WAYS TO TEACH YOUR KIDS TO LOVE THEMSELVES

The most important worry or question any parent has is – “How can I make my child so confident that s/he can face anything in this world and be successful?” This is a million dollar question and here is your million dollar answer. You do not need to do anything fancy and carry a worry worm within you. Worry has no power by itself. If backed with action it becomes motivation, if left at worry it becomes disease and if left with inaction, it becomes a mountain of problems. Hence, here is the list of THINGS TO DO TO KEEP YOUR CHILD BUFFERED.

  1. ACCEPT: Accept that your child has his or her own bag of karmas and nothing you do will completely change those karmas. They have their rocks and mountains to climb to learn from and some are really born with a silver spoon. It is just what their soul chose. Hence, you are NOT the person in control, you are only the guide!
  1. CHANGE WHAT: It is important to focus our efforts in the right direction. Do not attempt to change your kids. Attempt to change their behaviour and help them make productive choices. An introvert will remain an introvert no matter how much your try. If the introvert changes into an extrovert that is because either the situations made him so or because the child was always an extrovert but required the right opportunity. We cannot turn wood into iron and vice versa. The more you show your kids that you love them for who they are and that there are STRENGTHS for all kinds of personality, the more they will be confident and love themselves.
  1. DON’T PRAISE EVERYTHING: Honestly, this is a hard one for me too. It is so easy to WOW everything for our kids. But the truth is that it harms them at some point because it creates EXTERNAL MOTIVATION and a tendency to PEOPLE PLEASE. They must know to self-analyse and be self-motivated independent of what others think. This is a great way to boost their self-confidence.
  1. CREATE SELF-RELIANCE: I love the Montessori philosophy that – “Don’t do for the child what the child can do himself”. The more independent kids are, the more they are confident to face the challenges of the world. In the Indian culture we tend to over-protect our kids and do a lot more for them than they actually need. Living in USA, I have been awed to see that a 1 year young child eats NOODLES and all meals by himself or herself and that they change themselves by age 2 and more. It is amazing how much they can learn if we allow them to.
  1. SOCIALIZE: The more you socialize as a parent, the more your child will too. Social skills are critical to confidence and success in today’s globalization. Few businesses or works are in isolation of other people hence teach them to socialize by modelling the correct manners. I don’t mean PARTY while you leave them at a baby-sitter. I host, invite, attend other moms’ homes with the kind of values you want your child to learn.
  1. LABELS ARE LOUSY: Never label your child as – “Lazy” “Motu” “Fatso” “Darpok” and so on. Those labels may be fun for you but they carve and itch themselves in your child’s brain and then the brain learns to be STUCK on it forever. Growing up, you may see them do exactly what the label says and mark their way to failure. Imagine failing at something only because you were called names a 1000 times in a decade. You may label their behaviour instead – “This sounds like a lazy idea or you are being lazy” which is very different from “you are lazy”.
  1. PERFORM but not OVER-PERFORM: The world is a stage and we are the performers. As parents we are so anxious to MAKE THEM SMART. I don’t understand that concept of enrolling a child in 5 classes to make them smart! School, heavy bag, heavy H.W., lots of classes, late sleep and over burden creates BURN OUT not smartness. Choose 2 classes at a time and use them to the fullest. Allow them to stage perform if they want to or don’t mind it. But forcing a child to be on stage I Have them practice at home to hone those 2 skills. The rest of the time that you used for 3 other classes, instead use for spending one on one time with your child. You can save your Rs. 6000 by playing UNO, SCRABBLE, CHESS and MEMORY with them instead. It will make them smarter than you think, save your money and also save the STRAIN in your relationship with your kid.
  1. NEVER CRITICIZE, JUDGE, STRIP YOUR CHILD WITH YOUR ANGER: “What a shame that ….” “You don’t even know that much…” “I have told you so many times but you are so stupid…” “You fool…” “You could do better than that…” “I told you to do this but you did not listen…” are the best ways to strip your child off their self-confidence forever. Why don’t you turn around and use all those statements on yourself? Feel great uh? Makes you very confident uh? Worse still, use these statements, angry voice and REJECT your child in front of others. Doesn’t matter sister, mother, close friends, whoever they are to you, to the child they are ENEMIES OF SELF-CONFIDENCE and SELF-WORTH.
  1. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE: Love your child no matter what. Your child was not born to INCREASE YOUR STATUS and NAME in society. S/he was born to allow you to love and to give you love in return. Keep it simple, don’t pollute it with expectations of the world. A 10th rank doesn’t make your child less lovable, neither does failing. It only means GOD IS TESTING YOUR ABILITY TO LOVE NO MATTER WHAT!Express your love, hug them but not so tight that they feel uncomfortable ;) Use the “I love you” statement not to get their approval or make up for your mistakes but because you truly value their existence in your world.

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  1. APPLY WHAT YOU READ: You have read many articles, now apply all the good stuff you read. Stop, Think and Start applying at least 2 of the above points.
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Self-Awareness

Top 12 Ways to Beat Your Sugar Cravings

Umm, sugar is so yum. How can anyone have coffee or tea without ‘S-U-G-A-R’!! But it is also the most contagious ingredient and the biggest enemy of the heart! So let’s ‘manage’ it. Bring a balance.

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1. DIAGNOSE IT CORRECTLY: sugar cravings are a lot more about something else and a lot less about ‘sugar’. We crave sugar for a reason other than the sugar. The sugar has a potential to give our brain ‘happy signals’ so what else is your brain missing which could bring the ‘Happy Feeling’? Love? Nutrition? Food when hungry? Relaxation?

2. EAT MORE DARLING: S-T-O-P starving!! It never helps, not in the short term and it 100% harms in the long-term. You rather eat 6 small meals a day every 2.5 to 3 hours than have 3 large plate-fulls.

3. PLAN AHEAD: What are you eating at the next meal? Decide before you wrap up this one. That way you are not scrambling for food when your stomach is screaming ‘Hunger’. What choices to make at the party / travel? E.g. eat ahead and then leave, pack health food, plan to visit places that give you healthy food options, etc.

4. SEEING IS BELIEVING: Our brain is so programmed to ‘see’ things before interacting with them. So let your brain interact with the healthy stuff more and you have won your battle half way through. Right now check what your pantry and snack drawer shows you when you open it? Do you see more sugar or more health? Also, keep your meals READY in See Through containers right at your vision.

5. ATTRACTION IS THE KEY: You are building a RELATIONSHIP with your food, so better make it attractive!!! While you decide on MORE salads, soups, oats and juices, add some nuts, seeds, cilantro, dates, raisins, strawberries or whatever your require to make your body CRAVE for the healthy food in the same way as it craves for the sugary foods.

6. RAKE THE FAKE: Rake out or throw away all your fake sugars – sugar free, diet cokes, Splenda, etc. are very harmful to our brain since they are more processed and contain essences or ingredients that are chemically harmful. You rather have a whole bar of chocolate with sugar in it than have one piece of sugar free chocolate. Your body can fight out the former much more easily since it is much less complex food!

7. CUT THE BRANCH: Stop ‘Hanging Out with your Guilt’ forever. You ate it, that moment is gone forever! You criticizing yourself, thinking about it a 1000 times, beating yourself up will not help one bit. Rather take a pen-paper, write your next goal, stick it on the wall

8. WHO ARE YOUR REALLY?: Ask the Sugar – “Who are you really?” Is the sugar your hurt from past relationships, resentment and bitterness towards your parents, partner or friends? Is it your habit from childhood to protect yourself or to make yourself feel better? Is it your way to relive your happy moments that you miss or just the lack of enough sleep?

9. SLEEP EARLY: Do this for 30 days in a row, sleep before 10.45pm and a 100% you will see a dip in your addiction, weight, stress and a growth in your health. Now, I am in the challenge too, I need to be accountable as well.

10. FOOD JOURNAL: My Dietician Anuvi taught me this in 2006 and it has been my savior whenever I put my mind to it. Note down every little thing you ate, in each of its amount and time of the day and run back on your notes each week. You will surprised how many times you told you mind – “I am only having a little bit” Food Journals have great ‘mirroring’ power, use it to your benefit.

11. KNOW YOUR FOOD: Carbs is also sugar. The chapatti and grapes are sweet tasting because they have carbs which convert into sugar in our body. Do your best to include more proteins, fiber and less sugary veggies in your diet.

12. BUNK THE CALORIES: In the 18 kgs I shed in a year, not once have I looked at calories. Eat clean carbs, more protein and some fats.

Article Credit: Inspired by Kathy – my once upon a time, Fitness Trainer Friend

Image Credit: Flickr found on Google images.

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