Category Archives: PARENTING

Several Articles for Kids aged 2-10

Parent of the Month Series from Jan 2015 onwards – inspiring biographies from real life heroes!

PARENTING

13 Reasons to Introduce your Toddler to Physical Fitness

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The 1st time ever I SAW a fitness gym was when I was 24years. The 1st time my daughter SAW it when she was 2. At 5 years my daughter has been to a Live game of Basketball when I did so now at 34 years. Neither have I ‘seen’ a stadium ever before.

I haven’t tumbled till date and she does. She knows so many stretches, body exercises which I haven’t seen, heard, known, or done. Although I was lucky to have a great personal trainer from age 24 to 30, yet, coming to USA, I understood sports and physical fitness in a new way. In India, there is little awareness of how important physical arts is, esp. among the lower middle class + resources are limited and costly for parents who value it.

My daughter began Martial Arts at 4 years of age. I must admit that we have been lucky to have found great instructors for her. She is not very sports inclined but she has grown into it in the last one year. The amount of confidence and growth I have seen in her is beyond explanation.

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Advantage of Introducing Toddlers/Children to Sports and Physical Fitness:

– Creates Body Awareness: By moving our body in different and challenging ways on a regular basis, we learn to ‘understand’ our body. This creates more physical awareness and strengthens one’s sense organs. I grew up in a culture and country where the focus on the mind was a lot more and even more than the mind – the brain which is different from the mind. I learnt little about my body, I loved it less, I knew it less, I understood it even lesser!
– Boosts Self-confidence: All mind and no body is an irrational focus in life. In India, there is a lot of importance to academics but is not balanced out with enough sports or physical education. Even when I played a lot of throwball and handball in school, I never learnt the warm ups they do here. I have never done push ups for a sports warm up. Never knew what is kick-boxing, pilates, or zumba.  I’ve never jumped over or climbed over a wall or a fence. Being able to move our body in unique and challenging ways inculcates a lot of self-confidence!
– Facilitates Self-Love: There is no doubt that being physically fit and knowing the tricks of the game makes us feel good. Sports and Exercise has that ‘feel good factor’ which you want your kids to ‘stuff’ in their subconscious early on in life. Early learnings are the best learnings because they get submerged quickly into the subconscious mind as a ‘way of life’. Creating that feel good factor as a way of life in early childhood means GIFTING them with a Life-Long Skill of Loving Themselves

– Stress Buster: Exercising gets our brain to release endorphins. Endorphins are chemicals that make us feel more positive, feel good, and reduce our negative feelings. Let us admit it that children go through their own kind of stress. They have several physical changes to adapt to and on top of that, they have to keep up with our ‘crap!’ L-O-L. How many times in a day do we INSTRUCT kids what to do and not do; how many times do we throw our anger and tantrums at them? Besides us, they have school challenges to cope up with. I empathize with kids for sure!

–  Easy to Train: Kids naturally move around a lot. They have supple bodies. This makes training their bodies a lot easier. The younger the age, the better the outcome. Professional training ensures that they get age appropriate exercises to build on.

– Self-Protection: Self-defense techniques imparts skills for self-protection useful at any point of time. Unlike the belief I had, at least by witnessing her Taekwondo class, I realize, it has several elements of sports embedded in it. On the other hand, I believe, even if children were to learn any other sport, they would have an advantage in self-protection over someone who doesn’t. Regular and long-term sports training, creates a sense of ‘flexibility and quickness’ of both the body and the mind – a skill that can come handy when one needs to self-protect.

– Builds on a Possible Future: We may introduce our children to sports just for the love of or benefit of sports however, children may develop a deep connection with it. It could create the stage for a future in The Sports Field or expose them to early skills to be used later in inter-collegiate sports. Several colleges and universities also have extra credits for students who play sports. There is really nothing to lose here!

– Sharper Mind: The body and the intellect are closely connected. The reason why regular exposure to sports improves on concentration, focus, and memory is because it requires us to have CONSTANT PRESENCE OF MIND to indulge in any physical exercise. Can we close our eyes for 2 split seconds when jumping, running, tumbling? We must be conscious of every action, every landing, every move and this strengthens the brain muscles which comes to great advantage in Academics!

– Healthier Body: I doubt I need to write more about this. We all know the health benefits of sports and physical fitness. There is no doubt, no two ways about it!

Remember, children differ in their liking for sports. One child may like basketball, another tennis even when both are equally sporty by nature. Sometimes it requires ‘trial and error’ to different kinds of sports. Honestly, I forced her into Martial Arts and now she loves it a lot! Part of the reason is also because she loves The Energy of the place she goes to – the instructors, the teachers, the method of teaching. Make your efforts to discover what your child will enjoy. Do not presume or jump to conclusions too quickly. It took my daughter a good 3 months to begin liking it and now she doesn’t want to be off it.

– Family Bonding: Sports can be a great way to have fun with family. My daughter thoroughly enjoys our baseball games in the backyard or simple catch and throw. Best part is that it requires little equipment and space, can be played indoors and outdoors and creates some unique memories of happiness.

– Special Needs Kids or Special Skill Set: Specific sports are excellent for Special Needs kids like those who have ADHD, ADD, Autism, etc. They help in increasing focus and concentration which is one of the most important skill these children must build for healthier functioning or to cope better. Children also learn to Solve Problem and work in groups while playing sports. As adults we know how important it is to have skills to Work well in Teams. Your career in IT, as Teacher, at home within the family – all of it requires problem resolution by working in harmony with other individuals. Learning to balance our needs with others, solve problems effectively, and create healthy win/win solutions is what Sports implicitly promotes.

– Provides Opportunity to Socialize: There are several sports that promote group involvement. When kids meet other kids they learn to interact, to greet, meet, adjust to other personalities. This is a skill we need at every stage of life. Going to school, going to work, staying home with family, love relationships later in life and making and keeping up with friendships is all about being ‘Social’. Socializing skills are intertwined with Self-Confidence.

– A Competitive Spirit: Sports builds that competitive spirit which we want to have in today’s world. The aim is not to create an attitude of ‘Rat Race’ but to develop a Love for Healthy Competition, a Love for Winning and also the Grace of Losing Humbly. Sports teaches it all. Who knew that playing sports for extended childhood hours would help You in your field of marketing, insurance, IT, selling, etc.?!

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Images Source: Google Images

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Parent-Edge Magazine Articles by me

Children and Nature

This is a Re-post of my article from ParentEdge magazine http://parentedge.in/teaching-your-children-about-the-natural-world/2/

Note that this article has been edited.

Teaching your children about the natural world

animalsWe introduce our kids to some common animals at a very young age. Which child will not know Cat, Dog, Monkey, Lion and birds like Crow, Pigeon, or Parrots? However, our children are not exposed to a wider range of the natural living world. How many children know Seagull, Vulture, Yak, Mongoose, Hyrax, or Wildebeest at an age of 3, 4, or even 9?

The activities I list below will open up a new world to your children and increase their knowledge of the animal kingdom. You can add other learning to these with Phonics and Alphabets as well.

Age: 6+

These activities are designed for any child who can independently cut, glue, converse, and has a basic understanding of the living world around us. Alternatively, parents can conduct this activity for their toddlers or preschoolers.

You need:

  1. A large flat surface to work on: like the table or the floor.
  2. Print outs of several insects – uncut sheet: check image below for some of the insect names.
  3. Print outs of several animals – each animal cut into a square card. Make sure you have a variety of animal types like ones that live in the cold, in tropical or warm areas, mammals, non-mammals, etc. You may choose to keep the sheet uncut if you wish for the kids to do it.
  4. A pair of scissors per child.
  5. Glue stick per child.
  6. Markers and crayons for decoration.

ACTIVITY ONE – INSECT GARDEN

  1. Introduce children to all the insects you have on the sheet/s. You may share some fun facts about each insect at this point.
  2. Inform the kids that they are going to make an insect garden of their own, the way they like it. Show them an example from the image below and mention that different children make it in different ways and they are all ‘okay’. There is no one way to make it.
  3. Have children cut out all the insects. If you notice in the picture, I did not have insects printed in an aligned manner. This means it wasn’t as simple as cutting them into squares. Children had to work hard to cut around rounded areas without cutting into the next image. This helps increase attention, motor movements, eye-brain-hand co-ordination, and overall practice!

Allow them to stick their insects on a blank, white page to create their unique ‘Insect Farm’ or ‘Insect Garden’. They may use markers and colors to decorate the space and even draw.

insect farm5. Bring to their attention that they may categorize the insects as per their wish. In the image above, my daughter (age 5) categorized them as the ones she Loves and ones she Doesn’t Love. Some other kids categorized them by ones that can fly and ones that crawl OR they may not categorize them at all

6. They may create and share a story out of their garden if they wish to.

ACTIVITY TWO – ANIMAL and BIRD PLAY CARDS

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  1. Have the animal and bird play cards either cut out beforehand or have the kids do it.
  2. DO NOT go over each animal or bird. We are going to leave it for the kids to discover that on their own.
  3. Challenge the kids to be able to separate the birds and animals in two sections in the shortest time possible. You may time the kids if you wish.

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birdsGo over the answers and see who did it right. Note that some of them could be a challenge. g. Bats are animals that can fly (mammals) and ostriches are birds even though they cannot fly

5. You may now play other games using the same cards and may even make groups to challenge the kids. Eg.You can see in my animal section, I have categorized animals that live in the cold, ones that are found in the African Safaris, and the rest kept separate.

Make up your own games with these cards. Below are some examples I have stated.

  1. Phonics: Kids must pick out all the cards that belong to the alphabet sound you make.
    g. if you say the sound ‘Au’, they must pull out Ostrich and Ox. Focus on the sound here, not the alphabet.
  2. Alphabet: Kids must categorize all animals and birds mixed together as per their starting or ending letters.
    E.g. Seagull, Seal go in one section.
  3. Letters: Kids must arrange cards as per the letters you mention.
    E.g. if you say all the cards that have an ‘H’ in them go in the same category. So Ostrich, Cheetah, Hummingbird go in one section.
  4. Patterns: Kids must arrange all cards in altering patterns like one animal, one bird. You may time them for the same.
  5. Quiz: Take up to 6 cards at a time to help kids memorize names with 3-4 repetitions and then quiz them. Doing all the cards at once may be too overwhelming.
  6. G.K.: Share more information about each animal / bird.
    E.g. The reason why bats are not birds and ostriches are not animals. How different animals adapt to their environment; offspring names, and so on.

Parents, share your responses on these activities. Do you find this activity easy, fun, and educational? How soon are you committed to perform this activity with your kid/s? Did your kid/s enjoy these? What are your questions and queries? Do write back.

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parent of the month

The Biography of a Fearless Parent

~ Copyrights reserved.

Parent of the Month (July 2015): Deepak Chheda: aka ‘BHAISHREE’

“The waves of the sea tide high and low to test the strengths within you. They rise up high to see if you can fly when you cannot swim. They bow down low when they know that you shall glow even through a whole bunch of grey clouds!” ~ Dedicated to Dad by Rima D.

It is tough enough to be a Parent, think of being a Single Parent to two young girls with no real career or earning to begin with. In a NEED TO GET INSPIRED?! Read how this parent fearlessly faced all the challenges that life hunted him with…

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Dad was just about to be 34 years when Mom’s sudden demise struck him with immense shock and grief. Then, he had an older daughter at 9 years and me at 6 years. Call it trauma or chaos, he not only had two daughters to care for but also an immense financial burden.

I still remember the day when I was wondering why people all around me are all dressed in white and why they are all crying. What would I understand at 6 years of age? One of the following day, there was an exaggerated silence in our extended living room. Dad was sitting quiet on the 2-3 seater sofa we had – the only furniture that accompanied the long room. Everything seemed empty, not only our hearts, but also our home, and it felt like even the dead living room was crying to be more ‘busy’. I was wearing my white and red two-piece night dress with red hearts on the pockets, beautiful frills. It was my favorite dress. I asked dad – “Where is mom?” He sat there with no response. I can only imagine, how life’s painful demands must have blown upon dad like a loud, commanding trumpet that shakes us from our dearest dream. But he made it through…!

I have seen Dad take heavy loans in an attempt to give us just basic living. We lived in a huge home which was granted by grandpa but besides of that, we literally struggled for even basic clothes or good food. People judged us from the home we had and thought we were rich. We also lived in a suburb that belonged to the elite class since grandpa built his home there and we had cousins that were truly very well off. Our family was socially knit and religiously driven. Hence we had several rituals to attend many times in a month and when all of this is put together, dad had a lot to keep up to: The worry of building his business from scratch, educating his daughters while on a heavy loan, having someone take care of us after school (since school ended by 1pm);  get us enough clothes to keep up with the family and religious rituals, have maids to help us with house work – which was always a huge challenge, and a lot more… I remember his tears and worry when his very own close family members wanted to snatch our home and have us come on the streets. Dad had a legal battle to win to save his two daughters from being homeless, I remember that day when, the little child became his parent and said – “It will be okay dad” but inside my heart, I was hurt, scared, in anger. I remember tons of days of darkness, sadness, struggles in our lives where dad had to fight many social, emotional and financial battles…

I don’t think even a 100 pages can suffice for what I would want to express or vent you may say. I can say that no matter what faults others find, I can vouch for what he did right! In spite of massive financial burden and almost no support from outside, he gave us the best education. He put us in the most competitive and expensive school in one of the most elite areas of the prestigious Mumbai City!

That education has today led me to be this person who is writing on this blog, serving the community, and build a personality that can adapt to any cultural backdrop across the world. I haven’t had a problem conversing in English and interacting with the general public across different countries. My School played big role in it!
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I am honored to have learnt some amazing things from dad:

  1. Excellent Organizational Skills: Until date, I haven’t met anyone who can beat dad in his organizational skills.

  2. Social Skills: Over the years, I saw dad as very sociable. He was friendly, helpful and was quick to make them feel comfortable and good about themselves.

  3. Hard work and the value of being Responsible: Maybe there are people more hardworking than my dad or maybe there aren’t! I cannot owe him enough to teach me this important value. Dad gave his best swim across the tough tides of life. He never backed from his responsibilities even when he had several strong enemies in his business and life. I witnessed him face them all with great courage.

  4. God-fearing and religious – Dad exposed us to deep religious knowledge of Jainism and its rituals. Sometimes it felt like it was too much for a child but today I cherish those experiences and knowledge. It has imparted great wisdom and strength into me. He believed in God and taught us values like being kind, never eat animals, etc.. By belief in God and by modelling courage, he taught us to be Brave and Optimistic in life.

  5. Skills with Kids: Dad is just super with kids. He did great in having cousins stay overnight, arranging games and activities with them, teaching us in fun yet educational ways, entertaining the younger tots, etc. I subconsciously learnt a lot about playing with kids by watching dad over the years.

  6. Have the Faith: Dad taught without the use of words, that having faith and having an optimistic ‘expectation’ out of Life, always leads us to a ‘good’ place. He always taught me – “Never fear”.

  7. Strong cultural roots: I learnt to interact with elders, be courteous, be rooted to my homeland, to my religion, culture, be curious of other cultures, etc all from dad through his wise advices and by observing him.

  8. Business Skills: I have observed him to be an honest, fierce and powerful businessman.

I have learnt a lot from him and still continue to. No parent is perfect and no parent should be, because all that matters if we are bonded with ‘Love’. Love makes it Perfect.

“Dad I am Honored for all that I have learnt from you. You deserve all the success that is coming to You for Jee and me know how much you have invested into us and into life! We love You Unconditionally and so do your Grand-children”. Also, a Big Thank You to Jinal di for participating in this and for being a great sister through and through all the years till now”.

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Elder Daughter: JINAL

“Whatever I am today is only and only because of my Father. A highly organized person and extremely dedicated to his duties he has brought us up in a very cultured and disciplined environment. Playing the role of a mother and father is not easy. We have seen hardships he has faced in order to raise us so diligently. Spiritual and honest in his ways, he has given us a strong base to face the outside world. He always wears a smile and his simplicity adds a charm to his personality.

He can be like a child with his grandchildren and mold himself easily to his surroundings. Words are not enough to say or justify what I owe to him. Also Dad, Sarthak receives so much joy learning and playing with you”.

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A sincere and heartfelt ‘THANK YOU’ to you Dad for all that you have done for us. Love You!

        HBDD

BHAISHREE’S PARENTS – My Grandparents :))

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BHAISHREE’S ACTIVITIES

Dad continues to live independently by himself since 9 years now. He is as active as before but is living a simpler and a much more religious life now. He is now fiercely active in the Jain religious spectrum with his organization https://www.facebook.com/pages/International-Jain-Foundation-IJF-Mumbai/

He is working towards creating more awareness of and support for the Jain Sect. His recent, Jain event in Mumbai was embraced with a huge sucess. He is commonly and respectfully referred to as ‘Bhaishree’ by all who know him in recognition of the work he is doing for the Jain Community. This name has been ‘gifted’ to him by a Jain Monk.

 
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Fun with Kids

Comedy with Kids! Free Tickels…All Day!

Also posted in Parent-Edge Magazine on Aug 28, 2015

http://parentedge.in/free-tickles-all-day-fun-with-kids-like-never-before/

Having fun with kids is as easy as 2 + 2. Literally, all one needs is Kids and the willingness to be open, to be guided by kids themselves. We truly know a lot more about life as kids than as adults. Think of it – as adults we are stressed, we need Yoga, we need therapy, we need medicines, psychiatrists, and what nots! As kids all we need is – AN OPPORTUNITY, ANY OPPORTUNITY and we can create that into fun, laughter, joy, charisma!

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Today was our ‘Planned Funny Day’. We did not have any activities planned until the day began. All we knew is that we were going to wear our T-shirts ‘Backside Front’ and have fun! What began with a simple I-D-E-A, transformed into a day of thrill with a bunch of absolute crazy heads!

Here is a quick post (may be edited later) on the dozen ideas that ‘popped’ up like a string from a magician’s hat, merely from the start of a single wish to have fun!!!! I wont have some pictures here which features all the front faces but some cropped images to look forward to.

So we had my daughter’s friends visit me for this ‘Fun Day’. As they came with T-shirts rolled back, it was fun to see the spirit splashing around. Here’s one kid who totally flaunted this:

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And then I was the role-model of course. Got the kids ‘cracked up’ with these ones :D

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We used props to become different ‘Personalities’ and believe me we laughed, danced, marched our funny bands too!

PERFECT NOSE FLAUNTS

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MERRYING WITH MOUSTACHES

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MUSIC ON THE MOVE
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I AM THE SOCCER GUY
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2 o LALA, LADY GAGA!

That’s that for all the snap shots for our big shots! Let’s move now to fun activities. Who knows about the ‘Donkey’s Tail’?

4   10 Ha ha!

Our art was about making Funny Puppet Faces. Kids can be K-reative!

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We Colored Mr. Clown

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Then I had TICKLE – FINGERS: tickles18 (SOURCE Google Images Filtered Search)

and lastly we played a Game which kids love. We call it the Freeze Laugh games. We freeze in groups and kids in pairs must make us laugh around some rules.

It was a Crazy, Fun Day for Us. Feeling Inspired for Fun?!

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Fun with Kids

ARIZONA’S REAL LIFE STORY: A Contagious Act of Kindness!

ACTS OF KINDNESS

Often as parents we are frenzied over what to teach our kids and what to leave out. It seems the world’s encyclopedia cannot fit in everything that we may want our kids to learn. The most popular is of course, all the classes we want them to take; especially influenced by the ones their friends and cousins are taking. From all that could be possible under the sky, I give EXTREME Importance to teaching Kids KINDNESS and COMPASSION. These are ‘Qualities of Character’ which cannot be taught by ‘lecturing’ or by narrating ‘stories’. We – Adults, must be involved with the kids for them to see, to know, to experience. We must have a heart filled with Kindness which spreads joy and affection like a ‘contagious, irresistible hobby’.

Read this real life story, fresh from June 2015 ~ with Rima Desai

A story of 4 innocent hands powered by The Joy of Giving!

As the car screeched Stop by the beautiful waters, we could see how the heat at 37 degrees Celsius had left the place to a mere silence. Not a single soul! Out jumped the 4 little Heroes as I clamped their caps 1,2,3, .. The walk from the car to under the shaded tree was a bit of a journey, as the soaring sun stared angrily at our path. Finally under the shade, I removed our ‘packets of kindness’. With the intention to surprise the ducks, all of our 5 hands began offering bread crumbs in the water.

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Kids were thrilled to see that ducks that were snug and rested on the other side of the shore, began peddling into a flock and soon into a raft of little hungry mouths. The excitement was contagious! We saw some of the ducks fly in a frenzy. Our act of kindness drew not just the animals but also many ‘hidden’ pigeons and other birds into this ‘feast’. Our expressions clearly screamed more enthusiasm- “Where did they come from!”
We stood there for a good 20 minutes making our offerings in the water and on the grass. Most of the kids (except mine) were experiencing ducks up close for the first time; almost nibbling at their feet! It was a bit scary at first but soon became a sense of thrill and joy.

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We walked further looking for more ducks as we saved 1 full bag of the ‘kindness crumbs’. The lake was huge and so was our need to feed!

Walking further, we saw a pair of ducks swimming towards us. We realized that it was a ‘New Born baby’ being accompanied by its Mom. A cry of extreme excitement filled the air as all 5 of us were overthrown with joy to witness a new born baby duck for the first time! Our love for the cute baby spilled out ‘as if’ it could understand all that we said. We wished we had more food to offer and decided to return another day.

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Back home, we shared the pictures with each kids’ family. Parents were thrilled and overjoyed to know their kids were involved in such an act of kindness and that their kids were eager enough to share more kindness in days to come!

This post is brought to you by Facebook/Parenting Booth by Rima Desai. It is inspired by ‘It is a Happy World’s’ motivation to spread Happy News. Thank You Mihir Upadhyay for your contribution and for inspiring me to bring more ‘life’ to the post.

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Young Dad Appreciation of the Month

Anand Jaisinghani – July 2015

It gives me great pleasure to share this post as a dedication of my fondness and admiration of my First Cousin Anand ‘bhai’. I may have never told you, but I have always admired you Bhai. Happy B’day!

~ This post is brought to You by Rima Desai. All rights reserved. You may also read this post on my fb page: Parenting Booth: https://www.facebook.com/parentingbooth ~

FROM NATASHA TO HER DAD

On this Special Day I wish to Say, You are My much Admired for all that you have brought into my life.

hb TO dad p

“The days when you picked me on your shoulders and ran around the home, talked for long hours and never made me feel alone. When all the Qs I asked, unanswered you left none; spending times together, messing the home, eating chocolate, and all your surprises were a lot of fun!!

While I grew, I learnt a lot from You and when I went to Boarding, things changed into something new. I remember the letters I wrote and out of desperation, waited to hear from You. The more I shared my excitement and experiences with you, the more  the feelings of missing You within me brew. It took me that distance to realize how important You are to me and now, I could go on scratching our wonderful memories with a lot of glee. I must stop here to say I LOVE YOU DADDY, VERY DEEPLY!

I may have not expressed it like this before, but I do feel it with much rife, I am proud to say – You are the Greatest inspiration of my life!”

SOME OF YOUR BEST QUALITIES DAD

  1.  You explain anything to me in a Calm manner. Dad you have the power to make me feel Serene
    CALM
  2. You are super helpful. These are all your helping hands which I have observed over the years!
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  3. You are so selfless dad. You think so much for others versus yourself! You are such a loving and caring person, you have taught me to
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  4. Even though you don’t cook so often, when you do, it is SUPER DUPER DELICIOUS!!!!!! Dad I grant you the label ofmaster chef
  5. You have another special quality Dad – You are Verycreativity-396268_640

 

THREE THINGS I ENJOY DOING WITH YOU DAD

  1. Going for a drive

 

  1. Watching  NG or xpl  Channelor just sitting together and asking you tons of questions related to these channels.

 

 

  1.  We’ve never done that but… I would love to cook and learn things from You.

               YOU ARE MY hero DAD

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Young Dad Appreciation of the Month

Danny Carvalho – June 2015 Young Dad

This article is brought to you by Rima Desai ~ Copyrights reserved. It aims to appreciate young dads for their contribution in caring for their kid/s. You may also read it here: https://www.facebook.com/parentingbooth

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My   superman    Dad is    telegram35    years Today!

“Dad You are the Best!”

Words by themselves cannot describe my amazing dad. The day I was born dad was the first and the happiest person to hold me. He said, “Daddy’s little princess is here”. When mom worked 6 days a week, Dad spent an entire day with me each week. On that day he would take over mom’s role pretty well – he would feed me, bathe me, and also change my diapers.

Dad You are my Favorite because:

  •  You love to crack jokes and make me laugh
  • I love the way you tuck me in your arms and rock me to sleep with your sweet lullabies. For me you are the best singer in the world. Ha ha ;)

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Dad, I admire that you do chores such as ironing all my clothes and mopping  mop (Mom is lucky!)

Overall you are quiet a Cool Parent Sometimes you get impatient, but that much is allowed ;)

I enjoy watching      tv  TV with you while mom is already asleep    zzz

Dad You are not good at:

Cooking! You sure are a very bad cook and I see how you rely on Fast Food when Mom is not around.

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Remember daddy my little poem phrase – “Fast Food is not Good”.

Special Notes

Dad You are my First Love and my Superhero forever! No matter what I do or what I say, I know for a fact that you will always support me. Dad for You – “Any man can be a Father but it takes someone special to be a DAD!”

hb1  Dad! IMG_4078 Love You!

Also read: https://mystyrimz.wordpress.com/2015/06/01/youngdadmay2015/

 

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Young Dad Appreciation of the Month

Sagar Yerunkar – May 2015

This article is brought to you by Rima Desai ~ Copyrights reserved. It aims to appreciate young dads for their contribution in caring for their kid/s. You may also read it here: https://www.facebook.com/parentingbooth

SAGAR YERUNKAR – MAY 2015

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At 13 years (sometimes I read numbers backwards), my dad is super supportive! There isn’t much of an age gap between  dad and me. I turned 1 few days ago and daddy turned 31 on May 16th.  See, we are only 3 apart ;)

One thing is definite – my dad has mastery over story-telling.


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When he narrates me a story, he captures our attention. I may be distracted but yet, I get engulfed in his stories; mom too! You can see mom’s palm on her chin, eyes and ears in deep attention. And even if I hear less than half the story, dad continues it with a lot of enthusiasm. Love it dad! Now I can tell how dad charmed mommy. How many stories did you make up dad to impress mom?!

My dad is fun! Papa ensures he gets home on time to enjoy with me before I zzzz.

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 Mom says Dad’s face is a lantern of happiness when he makes me laugh. He does it every day and it is priceless to watch! Dad doesn’t know I just laugh because I don’t want to disappoint him. ;) (Just kiddin’!)

 

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Mom is pretty smart too. She knows how to put dad to work. She uses her leadership skills with him too. Guess, that (shhh… mom shouldn’t hear), mom has stringed dad into feeding me breakfast, dinner, and cleaning my dirty diapers on the weekends. Pee yu! :p

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Plus he does many more things to give her time. But I see why dad does it – he loves mom (nobody should know he is a little scared of mom too, like half a chocolate piece scared). Dad don’t worry, I didn’t tell mom how you sneak into the chocolate box.

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There are 3 things that dad barely does half as good as mom (sorry dad, mom told me to write this ;))

  1.  Tear free bathing
  2. Getting me to close my eyes for sweet dreams
  3. Keeping me still while changing my diaper

 But then Dad has his strengths too! Here is my SD – SUPER DAD

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Dad is Super good at

  1. Dressing me
  2.  Taking me to car rides

3. And playing Peek-a-Boo with me!

 Mom says: “Sagar is a super protective dad. Seeing them play together makes me wonder if boys will always be boys”.

HB DADDY!

Happy B’day DADDY!

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Also read: Young dad for April – https://mystyrimz.wordpress.com/2015/04/04/aprildad2-com/

 

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parent of the month, Venting Our Feelings

The Biography of a Beautiful, Courageous Mother

Parent of the Month II (May 2015): LATE MRS. MAYA CHHEDA

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 Today: 14th May, is my Late Mom’s birthday – Mrs. Maya Chheda. ‘My Parent of the Month’ Series will be incomplete without her mention. I will like to dedicate this post to her with the intention that it will reach her wherever she is. I believe that she did a lot more for others than she received. I intend that with this post, her soul ‘hears’ that she is valued, loved, cared for, and MISSED by many of us even now; that I owe her my life and I Thank her for all the goodness that she instilled in my sister and me in early years. She passed away at an early age of 33 years and I missed out on learning a lot more things from her.

Today I was working at my laptop when suddenly my daughter began singing – “Happy Birthday to you…” Oblivious in my work, I asked her whose birthday was it? She ignored my question and continued singing in the end addressing it to her grandma (my mom). I was thrilled! :)

 

MOM’S BACKGROUND 

Mom was born in a large family of 10 children. She was the last of them all and sadly for her, she didn’t get a chance to even see her dad. Her father passed away when she was yet to be born.

The growing years for all the children including her were filled up numerous hardships. Her mom (my grandma) had to financially support the family and also look after so many children. Even though grandma was physically present, she was emotionally missing from mom’s life. Mom was brilliant in academics and she received support from her mom and siblings to study. She was about to finish her Doctorate but did not end up giving the very last paper!

In her own life, mom had considerable financial struggles while she brought us up. She did the best in giving us the love and support she could. There were times of severe financial difficulty and I heard from my elders that she would not eat a single slice of fruit because she would save them to give it to my sister and me.
From the vague memory that I have of my mom, I remember that she would have us recite religious prayers before sleeping, from a very young age. Those values which she gave me in the first years of life, did remain with me and I can say that they came to my ‘rescue’ in my dark times. It helped me immensely to have faith in God and believe in praying.

 “Wherever you are Mom, I want to Thank You for embedding religious and moral values in me at a very early age and giving us all the care and love you did. We cherish that and love you”.

Below are heart-felt shares from some of her family members:

NIECE

“I loved her a lot. She was very intelligent and religious. She had studied Jain religion in deep. She was an expert in cooking and her pani puri was the world’s best. I was very fond of her. She was my ideal and I always wanted to be like her. Your Mom always believed in equality between girl and boy. She never approved of gender bias and clearly corrected those who discriminate between their son and daughter. I still remember her saying that one should give equal love to all children. I am going to feel her loss all my life”.

  

BROTHER-IN-LAW

 “As her name suggests, MAYA, she was full of ‘love’. She was like a sister to me. She helped her sister (my wife) to get married in spite of her partial disability. She put an ad in Mumbai Samachar newspaper. Because of Sister Maya’s help, today I have a wonderful wife and daughter. 

She was the most beautiful person in the family by looks and by heart. She would treat guests as God and her sacrifice and love for the family was unmatching. She has helped my wife in many ways. When our apartment was getting painted for 9 days, she took my wife – her elder sister to her home forcibly because she knew her sister had allergy to paint. And in those 9 days of stay, even though Sister Maya had her own difficulties, she treated my wife (her elder sister) excellent. 

We all miss her a lot. Maybe God had a plan to have her meet her father in heaven and hence took her away from us so early. She has been a blessing and she has left behind 2 beautiful Angel Daughters. May God Bless her and Keep her united with all family members here and in heaven”.

 DAUGHTERS

 We mutually remember that Mom used to knit sweaters for us. She was super talented. And she always made our birthdays special by making THREE cakes for us. I clearly remember one of the Strawberry or Pink cake that she had made. It used to be Chocolate, Strawberry, and maybe Pineapple. We know that Mom loved us a lot and did many special things for us.

 I remember when I would go down to play without shoes and get hurt with nails from the playground or the times when mom would call us back home. She also taught us to help in the kitchen from young age as often her health would not be good.

  “Mom I always bake cake for your grand-daughter’s birthday and she loves it. If you were here today, I would bake THREE cakes for You! I trust that you are well wherever you are and may you celebrate that life with Love and Joy You were a very courageous person and you have passed that on to us. Thank You Mom for everything!”

from all of us :)

SISTER

 Maya was extremely talented and affectionate by nature. She was good looking, independent, and smart. – She was very fond of keeping a beautiful, neat,  and tidy home. Her interests and talents included cooking, stitching, and socializing. She enjoyed inviting people and was loved by her entire family because of her loving and generous nature. She had wonderful handwriting too. She loved her daughters immensely; even though she was strict with them in her discipline rarely have I seen a mother who loves her children so deeply.  I still resent the fact that she didn’t complete her doctorate and that she struggled a lot with her kids in the apartment she lived in. I always remember her sharing her wish to come to USA. Whatever I say about her will be less. She left behind a lot of memories in our hearts. Her sudden loss is a wound that cannot be healed.

SISTER II

If I have to sum up in just few words, I can say that Maya was my best friend.
When we were young we shared the same mattress to sleep together, knowing that we had a highly modest upbringing. We laughed, cried, fought, and confided in each other. Many a times she fought with entire family for me! She was the only one I could speak out my heart to about some things that I could not share with anyone else. I think I was v.protective about her. I miss her immensely!———

Thank You everyone for reading this article and for blessing her soul :) It is easier to write about others than to write about someone of your own. 

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parent of the month

The Biography of a Gracious Mother

This post is brought to you by Rima Desai

Parent of the Month (May 2015): MRS. PUJA RAMCHANDANI

Today on May 13th, I am fortunate to celebrate the most memorable birthday – The Birthday of my ‘Adopted Mother’! Haha, yes! I call her my adopted mother. Well ideally, she adopted me as a child just a heart-to-heart connection, no official adoption, etc. She my best friend’s mom whom I found in my college years when I was lost, depressed, missing a mom figure in my life. My biological mother died when I was 6 and (Puja Ramchandani) Mom came to my life as an Angel!

This is the bio of a Parent who has faced numerous challenges in life with the best of courage and smiles. Even though she lost her mom at a crucial age of 17 years, she turned that difficult phase of life into a powerful journey. She has taught many of us to LOVE unconditionally, and to pass through the fogs with might. She epitomizes the word ‘Mother’ esp. for me as I call her ‘Mom’. Welcome our Parent for May 2015 – MRS. PUJA RAMCHANDANI.

Dedicated to You Mom, from all of us!

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As a child, she was reserved, shy, and could not speak openly with her parents. After losing her mom, her elder sisters were there with her only for a few years. (In India, girls got married very early in those times). Her dad was strict and disciplinary. She learnt important values from him but it also created fear within her. Losing a mom at teenage feels like losing one’s spine. Not having guidance, and support, she turned out to be an innocent person. When she got married, she was scared to travel by the local trains. She would want to visit her sisters who lived in town, far from her home. Her husband helped her a few times but eventually she gathered the courage to go by herself.

She steered through the challenges of her newly married life and built great relations with everyone within the immediate and extended family. After finishing house work, in the afternoon, she would find time to experiment with new recipes and soon her recipes were the ‘talk of the town’. She was always identified as a person who took great care of everyone in the family, her in laws, her children, and many others.

Mrs. Ramchandani’s life called for sudden and heavy adjustments. Often the dynamics altered between joint and nuclear family. Both of the family systems have their grave challenges and imagine having to make arrangements in the home according to how the family structure changes. Over and again, she took care of extended family members who lived with her for several months and being a mother, I can understand how that impacts one’s daily family life. The beauty is that she embraced each situation and ‘change’ with grace! Each time it was a different type of adjustment required and she stayed up to it powerfully.

Personally speaking, I have seen the small house they lived in. Having two young children, the way in which she adjusted in that short space and yet made it into a beautiful home is admirable! Even though she had a lot of family responsibilities, she ensured her children grew up with fun. She encouraged them to participate in activities, competitions, sports, and academics while also caring for all the other family members. She has always been very involved in her children at all stages and given them all that she has missed in life. I have also witnessed the dedication with which she cared for her ailing, bed-ridden father-in-law for more than 8 years. I am in awe of her!

In her mid-life, her husband and son relocated to a new country in their need to support the family and take the upcoming opportunity. It was a massive change. The responsibility of finances, caring for the home, in-laws, and getting her daughter through with her education, all fell on her shoulders. At this juncture Mrs. Ramchandani came out even stronger than before. Like the saying goes – The difference between ordinary and extra-ordinary is the ‘extra’.

We have a lot to write about Mrs. Puja, but we have more to hear: heart-warming words from all of her children. Her son recently got married and now her family feels complete!

Son: NILESH (NEEL)

“Mom, you know I do not express much with words but you mean the world to me. You are the most amazing person I know. The things you do, not just for our family, but for everyone are greatly appreciated… You have given me strength, values, and love. You are the best chef of the world. Your food has healing powers! You are the Angel of our family Mom, Thank You for everything you do!”

Daughter: SARITA (HANISHA)

Mom has given me so many gifts by just being the person she is. She has given me ‘LIFE’ and an opportunity to be a part of GOD’S Manifestation and a bond which is going to last forever. I cannot thank her enough for all the lessons and values she has given me as a priceless treasure.

“Mom you lift me up and never let me fall. You see me through and you see the best in me. You inspire me to be a better mom. Most of all, I cherish your hugs. Even when you scold me, when we argue, I am learning something from you. I am grateful for all your teachings. You are the Miracle of my World. You have Shaped me to the best of me and You are the reason, I am me. I am blessed that God chose me to be your child, my love for you is infinite!”.

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Memories with You MOM:

  • Story time with you as a child; esp. the bedtime spiritual Gurbani was just so relaxing and every night you gracefully taught me to face life with courage and moral values.
  • You stayed up with us for studies and exams like it was your test. I still remember how you stayed up praying and studying with us in our crucial years. You made us coffee / milk to keep us awake. You were so involved with Neel and I that we felt our classes and projects were as much yours and our competitions were incomplete without you.
  • After Neel and Dad relocated, I saw a stronger, different person in you. Those days are memorial to me as we shared our tough times together adjusting and making sacrifices.
  • You spend an awesome time with Nishika; you make a wonderful grandmother!

5 Special qualities of Mom:

  • Very helpful: You go out of her way to help others
  • Compassionate
  • Multi-tasking
  • Active and energetic
  • Quick and spontaneous on any task
  • Forgiving – even when people do bad things to you, you move on without grudges
  • You create happy surroundings wherever you go
  • I appreciate your chirpy, jolly, and hard-working nature

Daughter-in-law: PRIYANKA (SIMRAN)

“Mom, I am lucky to be your daughter-in-law. You give me the strength and power to adjust in a new place and you also make me feel comfortable. Even though I am away from home, I feel at home :) You are a special person because of the priceless heart you have. You are so loving and affectionate!”

My special memory with you is our welcome dinner dance on the song – “Tera mujhse hai pehle ka naata koi”.

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Son-in-law: AMITH MELVANI

When I came to India before marriage, mom made me feel extremely comfortable and because of that I enjoyed my wedding shopping with them.

“Mom, this is the perfect platform to share that when Sarita and me needed you the most during my challenging times, you were super supportive; you helped us immensely even with relocating our store. I was very moved by that. Mom I have known you as someone with a heart filled with so much love for everyone. You go out of your way to be of help without bias, even if that person hasn’t been nice to you. I am fortunate to have your daughter as my wife because she has imbibed your forgiving and caring nature. By law you may be called my Mother-in-law but I relate to You as my Mother!”.

from all of us :)

from all of us :)

 Notes from me: RIMA


 Writing my heart out to ‘Mom’ can be the toughest thing for me because there is so much for me to express that a sea of emotions explode. I am grateful, I have received this opportunity from the Universe to write about Mom. After God sent her down to earth, he listed – “No more in production”. Sounds hilarious but she is the Only one of her kind. ‘Grateful’ is a very small gesture I can say to her.

When I lost my mom at 6 years of age, I grew up feeling ‘greatly deprived’. I had a lot of internal pain from hearing other children use the word MOM. I had no one whom I could call Mom and as simple as that sounds, it is extremely painful for a child. Many people would SYMPATHIZE with me but mom was the the only one who went a step further. I was a complete stranger to her. She didn’t know my family, had never come to my home, and knew nothing else about me besides that I was her son’s classmate in school. Our religions were very different too. In those times, not many would openly embrace a person from a totally different religion.

Unlike all others, Mom made me her ‘Daughter’ and allowed me, in fact, declared that I refer to her as ‘MOM’. There is no other gift I can receive that can be more PRECIOUS. After so many years of lull, it was hard for me to even speak out the word ‘MOM’.

Year 2005, India

Year 2005, India

For several years, I had nobody to talk to, nobody who loved me unconditionally, no one who cooked food of my liking. I craved all of this deeply and often cried several hours at night. From all the friends and family – tons of cousins I knew, I was the ONLY one who belonged to a Single Parent family. This feeling slowly got healed as Mrs. Puja (Mom) made for me a place of great love in her heart and home.

Mom would invite me at her home and hear all that I had to say. She would go out of her way to cook food of my liking, food that she hadn’t cooked before. Being a Jain by religion, I wouldn’t eat onions, potatoes, carrots, and garlic at all. Cooking food without these ingredients was a challenge because it was totally new and unknown to her. But she LEARNT to make my favorite vegetables EXACTLY the way I liked them. She made the most delicious BHINDI (OKRA) veggies – the taste of which from the year 1999 is still in my mouth! Who would do all this for a stranger?

The way she has brought up her two kids speaks volumes of her character, her courage, her strength and her love. I will fall short on words and space to write for her.

“Mom you are way too special to me and I there is no way I can repay You for all the love you have given me. In cold, screeching blizzards of my life, you covered me with a warm blanket that kept me going safe and strong! You came specially to my engagement ceremony, that meant a lot to me. Thank You Mom.

I am more than grateful and I sincerely hope God will give me a chance to SERVE YOU, to CARE FOR YOU in return. Your love, comes out in your food and in your talks. You are so much fun, so loving, spiritual, courageous, and such a sweetheart. I know it is not only me, you have opened your heart to many children, many people, and helped many more than we all even know. I am far from you since several years but yet, I haven’t felt that distance. Even if we talk once in several months, you are there, just the same.

I was happily surprised to know how much Simran knew about me even before I spoke to her. Thank You for introducing me to her, even in my absence… what more should I say?… My eyes are full with emotion. I am sure there is a great reason why my Mom’s bday and your bday are next to each other and why I met you in this life-time! Over the years, you have allowed me to be myself and loved me unconditionally. I remember how I used to save money and call you from phone booths to talk to you. I LOVE YOU MOM”.

Husband: VIDU RAMCHANDANI

Puja is a very cordial, loving, and caring wife. I credit her for raising mature, wonderful kids and adjusting gracefully when both of us had to be away. She is very affectionate and very well organized in caring for the home and entire family. I am lucky to have such a loving and caring spouse who has blessed my family with her presence.

“Puja, you are the perfect wife and the perfect mother. I admire you for who you are!”

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This post is brought to you by Rima Desai Copyrights reserved ~  Will love to have your comments and likes to this post. https://rimadesai.org/

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Also read: https://theguidingstar.org/2015/05/14/www-lettertomymom-com/

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